funny

McCain / Palin = Tigh / Roslin

RobotPirateNinja curious, funny, media, Poli-Fi, President 08, Sci-Fi, us Tags: , , , , , , , , , 10 Comments
McCain / Palin = Tigh / Roslin

McCain / Palin = Tigh / Roslin

For those of you that didn’t follow it, Battlestar Gallactica was an excellent television program. From what I understand there is still one official episode for the series yet to be aired, but the current “end” of the series was something of a downer. A poster on Fark nailed down the plot precisely, which when compared to picture above, caused a bit of the ole’ lol.

Drunk Astronaut Quote 2008-09-02 09:46:40 AM
mythicknight: /by the lords of kobol

So McCain’s a drunken Cyclon and former terrorist who killed his first wife, and Palin’s a religious whack-job on hallucinogens and is dying of cancer? Keep in mind that Roslin led her people to a dead planet that is a smoking ash from nuclear war too…

And that’s pretty much how the show ended. And is a bit more evidence for the argument that this election is becoming a joke of epic proportions. The fact that I’m watching Joe Lieberman at the RNC just adds to the hilarity.
UPDATE: bOING bOING has more on this.  It looks like the conspiracy extends further that I first realized.
But not only that, they even have a campaign website.   The similarities are eerie.

Tigh doesn’t know how many homes he owns?
Fleet shocked that people own homes.

The opposition has jumped at the opportunity to portray Colonel Tigh as elitist as he stumbled in a recent interview to answer the question on how many homes does he own. The question came out of nowhere, specifically since no one actually owns a home in the Fleet and most people sleep crammed in ship hangers or multiple people to a room. Still the Colonel could not answer the question.

And…

Laura Roslin Responds to “Beauty Queen” Comments

Twenty years ago, candidate Laura Roslin won Miss Congeniality and Most Likely to Airlock a Cylon while a contestant in the Miss Caprica City Pageant. Ms. Roslin’s critics look to her days as a pageant participant negatively, citing it as just another reason why she is unqualified to serve as Colonel Tigh’s running mate.

Great stuff.  Good jorb,

Barry on Barry

RobotPirateNinja funny, media, pirate, Poli-Fi, President 08, us Tags: , , , , 1 Comment

Then Hillary Clinton magically appeared, like Glinda in the Wizard of Oz except wearing a pantsuit. She asked the convention to nominate Obama by acclaim, which the convention did, and the band kicked into the O’Jays’ hit song Love Train, which is about the urgent need to bring the world together in peace and harmony, and also to drink Coors Light beer.

Immediately everybody in the convention hall except Wolf Blitzer started dancing. I’ve been to every convention since 1984, and I have to say that Democratic delegates always manage to look good when they engage in group “rock-n-roll”-style dancing, in stark contrast to Republican delegates, who always look like they’re subjects in some kind of cruel mass experiment involving random-firing high-voltage buttock probes.

But the American nation does not choose its president on the basis of the musical abilities of his party’s delegates. The American nation chooses its president based on whether he exhibits certain key leadership qualities, such as height.

Dave Barry: Whatever, it’s a field goal – 08/28/2008 – MiamiHerald.com.

—

Obama is also taller than McCain. This means he’ll have more personal success in life.

Penny Arcade : Really Long Titled Video Game

RobotPirateNinja 3_RobotPirateNinja, business, funny, game review, gaming, iPhone, nerd, tech Tags: , , , , , Leave a comment


Penny Arcade : Really Long Title

Originally uploaded by el_wah

This is is a screen shot from the recently released Penny Arcade video game. I played through the game the other day. I should have a review up for it some time this week.

Quickie review: Solid RPG-Slight Action game with some funny dialogue and solid cell-shaded graphics. Roughly 8 hours of direct gameplay, and it looks like plenty more to come, as this was Episode 1.

Defined By Their Final Statement

RobotPirateNinja advice, Doh, history, pirate Tags: , , , 2 Comments

The 11 Most Badass Last Words Ever Uttered | Cracked.com

Everyone hopes to leave a legacy. To be remembered after our passing is the closest thing humans have to immortality, at least until cryogenics figures out how to reanimate Walt Disney’s head.

Some people try to pull off immortality with a lifetime of achievements and noble acts. But why piss away all that energy on altruism when you can simply spout one badass quote before you take the dirt nap and live on through eternity known as a guy who needed a second casket for his balls?

Some witty folks there.

The Andy Rooney Game

RobotPirateNinja cool, curious, funny, media, nerd, random, robot Tags: , , , , , , , 3 Comments

This is what the kids are playing today.

Finally, I can watch the guy.

and finally…

[via]

UPDATE: O.k. so here’s how you do it.

Step 1: Take the Intro and the first sentence of one of his rants (A).

Step 2: Take the last sentence of one of his rants (B).

Step 3: Splice A and B together to make C.

Step 4: Post C to YouTube.

UPDATE 6/7/2008

I just tried to create a wikipedia entry for the Andy Rooney Game, which I find very interesting.  However, it was auto-deleted twice, so there isn’t one for me to link to…yet.

Oh Those Funny Police Folks

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Got this forward this morning. From my moniker you can guess my general feeling regarding law enforcement. Regardless, they can still be pretty funny guys.

These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around
the country:

16 ‘You know, stop lights don’t come any redder than the one you just
went through.’

15 ‘Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch
after you wear them a while.’

14 ‘If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth
certificate a worthless document.’

13 ‘If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.’

12 ‘Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s the
speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.’

11 ‘You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can
write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?’

10 ‘Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think
it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift supervisor?’

9 ‘Warning! You want a warning? O.K, I’m warning you not to do that
again or I’ll give you another ticket.’

8 ‘The answer to this last question will determine whether you are
drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?’

7 ‘Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go
to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey
poop.’

6 ‘Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster
oven.’

5 ‘In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.’

4 ‘How big were those ‘two beers’ you say you had?’

3 ‘No sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we’re
allowed to write as many tickets as we can.’

2 ‘I’m glad to hear that the Chief (of Police) is a personal friend of
yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.’

AND THE WINNER IS….

1 ‘You didn’t think we give pretty women tickets? You’re right, we
don’t. Sign here.’

Good stuff.  Got any other favorites?

Mine was a discussion regarding how much of a dumbass I was, with a guy would could barely talk English and failed to name for than 5 continents on his home planet.

I Wrote This Under Sniper Fire « Robot Pirate Ninja (Follow Up)

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I Wrote This Under Sniper Fire « Robot Pirate Ninja

Looks like we have video for the previous story.

More

The most common modern sense of “misspeak” is in the US, where it has developed two meanings since the late 19th Century – to speak unclearly or to fail to tell the whole truth, says Mr Simpson. And it crossed the Atlantic in the mid 20th Century.

Fiona Douglas, a lecturer in English language at the University of Leeds, says the origins of the modern meanings go back to before 1393, when poet John Gower penned Confessio Amantis.

“The modern senses all have to do with unclear speaking and incorrect or misleading communication.

“The citations suggest that this ‘misspeaking’ can be deliberate or unintentional, conscious or unconscious – hence it’s quite interesting to speculate exactly what Hillary Clinton’s use of the word actually meant.”

[full story]

Stuff White People Like – White People Are Funny

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Stuff White People Like

Normally if someone were to wake up at 7:00 in the morning, take the day off work, and get drunk at a bar before 10:00 a.m., they would be called an alcoholic, and not in the artistic, edgy way that white people are so fond of.On March 17th, however, this exact same activity is called celebrating St. Patrick’s day. This very special white holiday recognizes Saint Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland who helped to bring Catholicism to the Emerald Isle. His ascetic life is celebrated every year by white people drinking large amounts of Irish-themed alcohol and listening to the Dropkick Murphys.

One of my favorite drinking games in call Whiskey In The Mornin’.

If you know the name, you know how to play.

UPDATE: The FULL LIST