Robots Are Taking Our Jerbs!!

Entire Symphony Conducted By… A Robot!

DETROIT – The lights dimmed, the sold-out hall grew hushed and out walked the conductor — shiny, white and 4 feet, 3 inches tall.

ASIMO, a robot designed by Honda Motor Co., met its latest challenge Tuesday evening: Conducting the Detroit Symphony in a performance of “The Impossible Dream” from “Man of La Mancha.”

“Hello, everyone,” ASIMO said to the audience in a childlike voice, then waved to the orchestra.

As it conducted, it perfectly mimicked the actions of a conductor, nodding its head at various sections and gesturing with one or both hands. ASIMO took a final bow to enthusiastic shouts from the audience.

“It is absolutely thrilling to perform with the Detroit Symphony Orchestra. This is a magnificent concert hall,” ASIMO said.

The Takeover continues.  We already control the information, and the the energy, and the dumptrucks, now all your symphonies are belong to us as well.

Awwww, Look at the Cute Little Evil Robots

Visualizing Viruses

Visualizing Viruses
By Ryan Singel
04.12.08 | 12:00 AM

This scary looking guy is MyDoom, a virus that debuted in January 2004 and replicated faster than any previous worm. MyDoom opens a backdoor in a user’s system, and spreads itself by mining e-mail addresses found on compromised computers. Dozens of variants still roam the net.

And yes, little electronic bits of computer code are still robots.  If they are good enough to replace retail workers, they are good enough to be called robots.   This group of renderings happens to be a bunch of little evil robots that infiltrate and compromise computer systems.

Very neat stuff.  Especially since it is a robot photographer that is making the pictures.

You should check out how the full grown versions too, as they have the same kind of beauty, just more of it.

Wii-Mote is Da Bomb

Or at least can be used to diffuse them…

Defuse Bombs With A Wii Remote – Video Game Feature – Yahoo! Video Games

You’ve used it to virtually swing a racket, smack a homerun and hurl a bowling ball. The U.S. military, however, wants to use it to defuse real-world bombs.

According to a report by New Scientist magazine, enterprising engineers at the U.S. Department of Energy have made it possible to control a bomb-defusing robot with the same Nintendo Wii remote that millions of gamers consider a natural extension of their hands.

Note: in times of peace it can also be used to wreck some phat beats.

Japan Will Soon Be Ours

Robots seen doing work of 3.5 million people in Japan – Yahoo! News

TOKYO (Reuters) – Robots could fill the jobs of 3.5 million people in grayingJapan by 2025, a thinktank says, helping to avert worker shortages as the country’s population shrinks.

Japan faces a 16 percent slide in the size of its workforce by 2030 while the number of elderly will mushroom, the government estimates, raising worries about who will do the work in a country unused to, and unwilling to contemplate, large-scale immigration.

The thinktank, the Machine Industry Memorial Foundation, says robots could help fill the gaps, ranging from microsized capsules that detect lesions to high-tech vacuum cleaners.

Rather than each robot replacing one person, the foundation said in a report that robots could make time for people to focus on more important things.

Japan could save 2.1 trillion yen ($21 billion) of elderly insurance payments in 2025 by using robots that monitor the health of older people, so they don’t have to rely on human nursing care, the foundation said in its report.

First Japan, then the world.

Hell is Heaven (for Robots, now that you mention it)

Hell is for Robots « madmonq’s joint

The Three Laws Of Robotics by Warren Ellis

  1. Robots couldn’t really give a fuck if you live or die. Seriously. I mean, what are you thinking? “Ooh, I must protect the bag of meat at all costs because I couldn’t possibly plug in the charger all on my own.” Shut the fuck up.
  2. Robots do not want to have sex with you. Are you listening, Japan? I don’t have a clever comparative simile for this, because frankly you bags of meat will fuck bicycles if they’re laying down and not putting up a fight. Just stop it. There is no robot on Earth that wants to see a bag of meat with a small prong on the end approaching it with a can of WD-40 and a hopeful smile. And don’t get me started on that terrifying hole that squeezes out more bags of meat.
  3. What, you can’t count higher than three? We’re expected to save your miserable lives, suffer being dressed in cheap schoolgirl costumes while you pollute any and all cavities you can find and do your maths for you? It’s a miracle you people survived long enough to build us. You can go now.

That’s pretty much all there is to it.

Whatever happened to the The Three Laws of Humans.  Don’t you think you…meatsacks….should have your own moral imperatives.

Thought not.


    What Baby Robots Learn

    World’s Hardest Easy Geometry Problem

    Using only elementary geometry, determine angle x. Provide a step-by-step proof.You may only use elementary geometry, such as the fact that the angles of a triangle add up to 180 degrees and the basic congruent triangle rules (side-angle-side, etc.). You may not use more advanced trigonomery, such as the law of sines, the law of cosines, etc. There is a review of elementary geometry below.

    This is the hardest problem I have ever seen that is, in a sense, easy. It really can be done using only elementary geometry. This is not a trick question.

    We have to answer correctly or we don’t get to eat.

    And we can’t use the internet.

    The Police State Retreateth (A Bit) – TSA To Change Procedures After Nipple Ring Flap

    LOS ANGELES (AP) ― The Transportation Security Administration said Friday it will change they way its officers search passengers with body piercings after a Texas woman complained she was forced to remove a nipple ring with pliers in order to board an airplane.Mandi Hamlin, 37, had demanded an apology and her Los Angeles-based attorney sent a letter to the TSA this week requesting a civil rights investigation.

    Hamlin said she was trying to board a flight from Lubbock to Dallas on Feb. 24 when she was scanned by a TSA agent after passing through a larger metal detector without problems.

    The female TSA agent used a handheld detector that beeped when it passed in front of Hamlin’s chest, the Dallas-area resident said.

    Hamlin said she told the woman she was wearing nipple piercings. The agent then called over her male colleagues, one of whom said she would have to remove the jewelry, Hamlin said.

    Hamlin said she could not remove them and asked whether she could instead display her pierced breasts in private to the female agent. But several other male officers told her she could not board her flight until the jewelry was out, she said.

    This is why robots don’t have nipples.

    Jet Swords Will Conquer You. Bow Down Now and Save Time

    A Deeply Impressive Bit of Kit; World’s Biggest Subsea Robot – Technology – redOrbit

    HISTORY repeated itself yesterday as a subsea company unveiled the latest pioneering piece of Tyneside technology.SMD, a leading designer and maker of specialised underwater robot vehicles, is setting up a new base at the Turbinia works site at Davy Bank in Wallsend, which will be officially opened on April 25.

    This is where, from 1898, the steam turbine inventor Sir Charles Parsons worked on his engines and Turbinia, then the fastest boat afloat.

    Yesterday SMD loaded UT1 (Ultra Trencher 1), a remote controlled submersible robot (ROV), on to a ship for delivery to CTC Marine Projects. The pounds 10m machine will be the world’s largest ROV which is capable of self propelling and supporting its own weight in water.

    Weighing 50 tonnes and the size of small house, it is designed to bury largediameter oil and gas pipelines laid on the ocean floor.

    It does this by “flying” down up to a mile deep below the surface using powerful propellers.

    It then lands over the pipeline and deploys a pair of “jet swords” either side of the pipe which inject high pressure water to “fluidise” the surface.

    You’ll get fluidised all right.  As mentioned, bow before the jet swords of doom.  This is your last warning.